I recorded a podcast interview this week with one of the founders of the Institute of Somatic Sexology.
Turns out, some very smart people figured out how to apply the nervous system tools of getting into the body to sex.
And why the hell not, right?
Who doesn’t want better sex? More pleasure? Toe-curling, mind-numbing, banshee-moaning orgasms?
It all starts with getting more tune with pleasure (instead of pain).
For example, instead of simply tracking discomfort and pain in the body…
…try following the pleasure.
Look for something that feels nice in your body (no, you don’t need to be touching your genitals or touching anything at all).
Simply look for a pleasant sensation that’s part of your experience at this moment.
Maybe it’s an open feeling in your chest…
…and a spot on the right side of your right thigh that doesn’t feel “activated” or tense.
On the other hand, if you’re in so much pain or discomfort that it seems there’s no pleasant feeling anywhere, that’s fine. Instead of looking for pleasure or pleasant feelings, can you find somewhere that feels less painful or uncomfortable than another place in your body?
The reason behind this practice is that we often get more of what we focus on (for various reasons that I’ve discussed elsewhere).
So if we focus too much on the pain, it can send us into a negative feedback loop, creating more tension and then more pain, which creates more tension and then more pain…
…but if we focus on the pleasurable and pleasant, it can send us into a positive feedback loop instead because the body starts expanding on the good feelings. It gets better (ie. WE get better) at sensing pleasure and as our capacity for pleasure grows, so does our experience of pleasure.
This is a basic overview of pendulation, a technique I teach in Rage 5 in The Rageheart Academy and then expand on throughout the course.
It’s a beautiful way to bring more lightness to your nervous system… and like the founder of the Institute of Somatic Sexology said, more pleasure 😇
And who doesn’t want more pleasure in life?
P.S. Know anyone who wants more pleasure in their life, whether delicious food, beautiful sleep or toe-curling, banshee-moaning orgasms?
Refer them to The Daily Growl (this email newsletter) and give them better tools for getting into their body, understanding their nervous system and expanding into new states of pleasure.